Step 4: Check each paragraph for unity. Each paragraph should have one
main point. Usually the central point of each paragraph is stated in a
topical sentence at the beginning of the paragraph, but not always.
You
should not mix different ideas together in the same paragraph. If you
are having trouble getting a certain section of your paper to sound
right, go through that section one paragraph at a time and ask
yourself
what the main point of each paragraph is. Fogy writing is often due to
mixed-up paragraphs.
Step 5: Work on the sentences to reduce the fog index. The Fog Index F
is defined as F = 0.4 (L + P), where L is the average number of words
per sentence and P is the average number of polysyllables per 100
words
of text. (A polysyllable is a word with three or more syllables.) To
evaluate the Fog Index for your paper, count the number of words per
evaluate the Fog Index for your paper, count the number of words per
sentence and the number of polysyllables per 100 words for a
representative portion of your paper five or six hundred words long.
Ideally, you should strive for fog index less than 10. In technical
writing, it is sometimes difficult to get the Fog Index below 10, but
a
Fog Index above 15 is a warning that your material will be very hard
for a reader to follow. Consider the following examples taken from
typical office memos. Note that both memos say the same thing. To
reduce the fog index, you must do two things: (1) reduce the length of
your sentences (by breaking long sentences into shorter ones), and (2)
get rid of as many complicated words as possible (by using simpler
words instead).
Step 6: Get rid of as many passive verbs as possible. Always check
your
paper for passive verbs. ("The data were measured and the results were
correlated.") Change as many verbs as possible into the active form.
("We measured the data and correlated the results.") Using too many
passive verbs makes your writing boring. Editor's comment: At their
worst, passive verbs can make writing incomprehensible. The reader
always needs to know who is doing what to whom, and a passive verb
often obscures both the agent and the recipient of an action. In Ted's
example, the passive form obscures who it was that measured the data
and correlated the results.
Step 7: Use verbs more than nouns. Do not bury the main action of your
sentences in nouns or adjectives. Instead, let the verbs carry the
and correlated the results.
action. Consider these examples: Example: " The annual report produced
a disappointed reaction from the sponsor." Revision: " The annual
report disappointed the sponsor." Example: " It is our expectation
that
we will see radiation pattern improvement when the antenna is
elevated." Revision: " We expect to improve the radiation pattern by
elevating the antenna." Your writing will sound better if you move the
action into the verbs.
[此帖子已被 qxfy 在 2003-7-12 0:19:03 编辑过] |