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发表于 2003-9-1 02:51:28
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With You I Go Beyond Myself
It's dark. Dark and cool and tight against your skin. You're not sure
how you let yourself get talked into this, but now you're there. It's done
and you're in it for better or worse. So damned silent now. So quiet after
the methodical creaking of the wooden bed frame and groaning of the straps
as one by one they tighetend along the length of your body. Step by step
you gave up control, at each point thinking, "This is it. This is the point
I lose this part of my body." The clicking of the buckles as each end locked
into place. A creak and a groan as leather pulled taut and took your limbs,
and your will, with it...
It started with the blindfold. Simple enough. Just like closing your eyes.
Yet different. Padded on the underside and being tied expertly behind your
ears. Blocking out everything. Not a hint of light. Somewhat frightening.
It is that first splash of cold water you know is coming but you aren't quite
ready for. Your chest tighens and your heart begins to beat faster. Then
it is snug against you and the light is gone, leaving you with the soft scent
of the hide working its way into your mind.
Arms stretched wide next, long strap tied underneath the bed, wrist to
wrist. Hands connected to each other by the strap beneath you, seemingly free,
attached to nothing but themselves, yet you cannot move them. Each movement
you make is answered on the other side by an equal and opposite force.
Another short strap on each buckle pulls them up at a slight angle over your
head and attaches them to the head of the bed. Arms wide open, breasts
exposed comlpetely, falling full against your ribs. Elbows locked into
place now. Tugged slightly too much, muscles stretched, almost working
out an inner soreness. A satisfying yawn taken too far and held there.
Surprise at the loss of control. You didn't expect that. Not really.
You truly cannot move your arms.
Straining to hear my actions, but I seem far away. The darkness is like
a blanket of snow. It mutes what should be close and clear. You hear the
sharp clinking of another buckle and just barely catch the sliding of more
leather being drawn up. You feel my body close again. Not a word is spoken.
A simpler bond this time. A single strap coming around underneath the bed
and back up over you. The leather lays across your stomach. You feel my
warm fingers as I bring it up and tuck it underneath each breast, against
the bottom of your rib cage. My hands leave you and you hear the buckle
again. Suddenly this bond too, is tight. Your upper body is pulled against
and into the sheets. Ribs crushed slightly, that heaviness to breathing.
The way your torso is pushed into the bed feels like a thick body on top
of you. It feels strong. Halfway there.
I retrieve another strap. It's really happening. You feel so tight in your
chest now. Such anticipation of what you want. Such a hot hard desire inside
you. But you don't know what you're going to get. All you know now is the
smooth leather and the bed beneath you. Muscles stretched and slightly
cramped. Tingling senses still where you have felt my warm touch on your
hands and chest and stomach. A feeling of openness. Of complete nakedness
to my inspection and desires, whatever they may be. Your body betrays you
and you can feel the heat rising between your legs. Your breasts swell and
nipples harden and feel huge. They yearn for a warm tongue. The air suddenly
seems so much cooler. You begin to feel the need. You begin to get lost in
your senses. The fear of the unknown is still there, inside you. Growing
as each part of you submits completely. Submits and stays submitted, wihout
choice or reprieve. I grab an ankle in each hand.
Suddenly I pull down, from the end of bed. Not hard, not yanking you, just
firmly. Like one of the bonds holding you I pull you tight, stretching you
out. I seem to be in a hurry now, in spite of myself. Too eager to see you
bound as I wish you. Too eager to have you purely as my plaything. I buckle
an ankle. The strap goes underneath the bed as before, but this one is
shorter. I buckle the other leg in soft leather and pull you open for me.
Strongly to each side, and downward towards the corners. Once again you feel
the aching soreness in the muscles as I widen you farther and farther.
Stopping only when I am satisfied. You can almost feel my gaze judging your
position. Deciding when I have you anchored properly as far as you can take
it. And then a little farther.
Your legs are immobile. Your sex is open and you can feel the inexhaustible
heat rising. Each time you think of your wetness it only dampens more. You
can't image how slick you must be by now. That little ball of fear is there
though. It works away at the back of your mind wondering what is going to
happen next. What you have done to yourself. What will be done to you.
Almost there.
I get my last strap. I pause as I sit on the bed. You aren't sure what I'm
doing. Why I stopped. You feel the tip of the belt tickling your stomach
lazily. I am drinking you in. Feeling your excitement and desire for me.
Enjoying the sight of body open and waiting for me. The bed creaks, I am
moving again.
Across your stomach. Sliding back and forth as I manuever it under the bed
and back over. Wrapped around you and around down around the bed and buckled
to itself. Now I move it down to your pelvis. Above your mound, just over the
beginning of your soft hair. Tight now, but slowly. I am being careful
to avoid your stomach or pulling the hair on your mons. Tight enough now,
and I stop. Your pelvis pulled into the bed. Your entire body tight against
the sheets. It is done. You are mine now. I can wait no longer to satisfy
myself by touching you. Your heart is racing, you know I am done binding you
but do not know what I will do next.
But there is one last thing I want before I can end the beginning. One last
detail I must make sure of. I lean towards you, until you can feel my warm
breath on your cheek. Calmy, in an even voice, my face a foot from yours,
I speak a single word:
"Struggle."
And you do. You pull one arm against the other. Try to rise until you
hurt yourself. Try to kick against the leather. The bed creaks and strains
with your efforts. You pull your entire body against all the bonds at once,
hoping to find some weakness. Hold there. Straining. Straining. It is of
no use. You fall back the scant inch you have gained. You are struggling
against your own body. Pulling against straps tied to yourself. You are
doomed to fail. The fear and frustration grows. The ball of doubt burns
inside you. "I told you this would happen." it says, petulantly, almost
gleefully, "I told you."
I put my hand on your head. Stroke your hair and whisper "There there, my love,
there there." I bend down and my lips meet a trembling mouth. A soft kiss,
only our lips touching for the longest moment. Warmth, contact, love. The
tension inside you breaks. The ball of fear melts and the hot yearning need
for me rises stronger than before. Your doubts wash away in that kiss and you
are utterly mine. My contact, my presence, my warmth and my body assure your
safety. You revel in my control of you. My command orders ultimate pleasure.
My control brings you to utmost safety. My will brings you to exciting
newness and then back again to calming tradition.
I am the depth of sleep and the height of awareness. I am your all.
I break the kiss, move my head up slightly, bend back down and resume
again. My tongue enters your mouth and lashes warmly against yours. I
break the kiss again.
"Not so quickly, Love. We have much time yet. We have just begun."
You want to grab me. To pull me against you. To hold me. Instead you can
do nothing. I can see your need.
"The bonds hold you for me. They are my tight grip and my pressing body.
Submit to them as you submit to me."
You relax as my hands begin to roam you. Up and down your flesh. They are
your connection to me. But suddenly they are gone, leaving only hot skin
behind.
"Rules, my sweetness, there are two rules we must discuss."
The last word has an ironic lean to it.
"First, you do not speak unless I tell you to speak. Just as I have bound
your body, I bind your tongue and throat for myself as well. When I
command you to speak, it is to hear the words I have given you to say.
If I ask you to speak it is to hear your voice that it may pleasure me.
For example, you will now respond only 'Yes' when I ask if that is
clear to you."
Pause. Silence. Expectation.
"Is that clear?"
Your lips almost seem sealed shut but you manage to pry them apart. You
barely recognize your own voice as you speak. The sound comes out as
a croak. A cross between a whisper and a cough. It fills you with trepidation
to speak, you practically stammer.
"Yes."
"Very good."
You can hear the smile in my voice. The quiet grin at the edge of my words.
Your hesitation at the simple task you had no idea how to perform, yet you
performed so well, so beautifully. Exactly as I had wanted you. Just another
level of your openness to me.
You hear cloth whisper and realize I am disrobing. You feel flushed as a wave
of heat passes over you, thinking of my nude body. Suddenly I am close.
Closer than I have been yet. Against you. I whipser in your ear. Warm
air in your ear and through your hair.
"Rule two."
A hand moves across your thigh, up your stomach, firmly, squeezing and probing
each part of your flesh as it goes.
"When you pleasure me, when I use you." My voice drops even further, barely
audible, below a whisper, yet clearly enough that I know you can hear me.
"And have no fear, my love, I will be using you tonight. Fully."
The hand on your stomach moves higher, cupping your breast. Warm against it.
Stroking gently, kneading the entire underside softly.
I resume my earlier whisper against your ear, softly, yet loud enough to carry
the tone of command.
"When I am enjoying your body, you must do only as you are told. As you are
still free to speak, I have given you yet more freedom, your head is not bound,
and neither are your fingers. Not physically. But they are bound to my will
by the strongest steel. You will do as I wish."
The hand on your breast rises, moves over the top. Finds a nipple. Pinches.
Softly, softly, caressing, then suddenly hard and just as soon gone. Except
for the tingling heat spreading out across your breast, you almost wonder if
it even pinched so hard at all. There was no time to shudder.
I rise. My voice clear and loud again.
"Now, my love, I will kiss you again. It is not yours to kiss me. It is
yours to wait until you are kissed and then to be kissed until I wish to
move on. You will answer me again 'Yes'. Is that clear?"
"Yes." It comes easier this time. You want the kiss. So badly. You need
the kiss.
"Very good."
Heat again. My body over yours. You can feel the warmth of my chest as I
lean down to you. My body's heat merging with your own. You can smell
the scent of me as I lean toward your face. My breathing fast. My excitement
clear, yet also bent to my will as you are. Held in check until I release it
and all it's furies upon your helpless form. My face moves closer. Closer.
A hand finds your inner thigh and shudder and gasp in pleasure. Yet you hold
still. Head resting back. Immobile still. Yet yearning, wanting my lips.
Your lips feel dry. Parched with desire. You swallow, ever so shallowly,
it is lost in your trembling.
I move closer. Inches. You can't tell how far. It seems like nothing. No
distance could ever be so short and so long. My kisses are a mere raise of
your head away, but you do not move. It is not yours to take the kiss.
The hand once again slides up your body. The contact is so good. So perfect.
My heat is so close, breath on your face, you can feel and hear every detail
of my respiration more than you can your own. The hand moves up, around your
chest, under your right shoulder. Grips you firmly.
I speak again, my voice a wash of my breath softly over your lips.
"Very good, sweetness. Perfect."
I move, ever so slightly, our lips meet.
Kiss. Draw up. Kiss again. Firmer. Stop. To the side, so slightly.
Kiss again. Over and over, softly, yet so there. So much what you had
to have.
A hand slips under your head and I pull you closer with both my arms. Your
muscles, stiff now, protest. I kiss you harder now. Tongue in your mouth,
meeting yours and moving on, exploring you. The leather creaks and I kiss
you harder still.
I am against you, yet above you. Close, yet aloof. I am pulling you off
the bed, each movement up towards increases the angle of your shoulders and
hips back towards the bed. Your chest is being thrust out. Finally touching
mine, nipples finally crushed against my heat. But your arms groan and your
legs strain. I kiss harder, tasting you, taking you, satisfying one tiny
portion of my lust. Hands massaging your skin in hot adolescent grabs. You
are crushed by the bonds, the breath is pushed out of you as I pull you into
me. You cannot get enough of me and yet any closer and you will be broken
in half by the leather straps. I pull you higher and harder than your even
your earlier struggles. So tight...
Then I am done. The ferocity ebbs. The strength of the kisses begins to
recede like a wave back into the ocean. I gently lay you back against the
bed, then bring my fingers back slowly across your flesh as I draw my hands
up.
"Nice. Good."
You can hear appreciation in my voice. Raw need still there, in check, but
anxious, waiting, secure in the knowledge it will not be denied. I stand up.
You hear me inhale and exhale deeply.
"Be right back, sweetness, just relax." An almost post-orgasmic feel to my
words.
You follow my footsteps as I leave the room. Savoring the aftermath of our
intimacy. You can feel each spot where I touched you, still burning with
our combined heat. Your stretch each limb slightly, easing tendons and
muscles and joints back into position. The bonds almost feel snug now,
comfortable again in their familiarity. You sigh and feel your pounding
heart begin to relax, time enough to appreciate what you could only experience
a few moments before.
I return with the padding of my feet across the carpet. Padding catlike
and careful, a clinking glass with me. I cross the room to you, sit on the
bed. "Something to drink, for the both of us. I certainly need it." I
say casually, putting my hand behind your head. I lift your lips and you
feel a cool smoothness against them.
"Drink."
Your mouth opens, sweet ice-water flows past your dry lips and over your
tongue. You begin to gulp it down as it pours in, not knowing how fast
or how slow to swallow. The flow increases and you can sense me tilting
the glass higher. The liquid pours into your mouth and some escapes to
form tiny streams down the sides of your flushed face, to mat your hair and
join with your sweat. I slow, and then stop the draught. I lower your head
back down.
You hear me drink. Greedy swallows, a loud satisfied breath afterwards. I
set the glass down. You feel my hand on your head, stroking your hair once
again.
"Those are our rules, my beautiful one, our only rules. Simple rules, are
they not? Almost natural. Yet perfect. And they must be there. They
must be spoken. You have made me proud..."
I pause. You hear me inhale again, exhale. A finger comes to rest in the
center of your chest, between your burning breasts. Glides down, around
your navel, over the leather strip, into your pubic hair, and back and
forth gently. My voice lowers this time, an edge to it, the desire fighting
its way upward from my fierce control. A low tone, a male tone.
"... and excited." |
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发表于 2003-8-28 04:34:03
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